Home » Post Item » Ilocanos and Pre-holiday depression

Ilocanos and Pre-holiday depression

Monday, October 3, 2005

Around this time of the year, from the
beginning to the middle of October, I become REALLY depressed. I don’t
know if it’s a hormonal thing, some really fucked up male PMS’ing, or
just the air that circulates this time of year.

Maybe it’s because Christmas is right
around the corner and I hate Christmas just about as much as I hate
polio. I mean, as I was growing up, Christmas was just pure magic– and
not just because of the presents mind you but because I had a wonderful
family to spend them with and we had a number of traditions. I don’t
know when it all stopped but it did and it’s just really sad. Thing’s
just aren’t like they used to be; I guess it’s just me coming to expect
that my family would always be around; I mean they still are, but we’re
just divided nowadays.

Having worked in the BPO industry for
two years didn’t improve things either. The previous company I worked
for ran a Directory Assistance gig for one of the top telephone
companies in the United States meaning that they had to maintain a
skeleton crew even on holidays. That means that I could only be home
with my family either only on Christmas or New Year’s eve and sometimes
even miss both because of work.

My past couple of Christmases had me
visiting two different sets of relatives whereas before, we would all
just gather at my cousin Kuya Pau’s house or ours.

This would be okay I guess but the Ilocanos from my mother’s side of the family who visit us over the holidays are just plain fucking weird. Why?:

  • I just love my sixty something aunt who, somehow, managed to lose all her tact not to say things like “Boy
    what have you been eating? You constantly gain weight every year!” Then
    pats me on my tummy while my other relatives laugh at my expense. Oh
    and is the chicken overcooked? Well fuck it, then by all means
    humiliate the shit out of the person who cooked it by broadcasting your
    opinion to the whole room.

  • I’m all
    about good conversations, and with my family, I need not look further.
    For what seems like two hours, my relatives discusses at great detail
    what they want to be done with their body when they pass away. Some
    wanted to be cremated, some wanted to be buried and my uncle Ben,
    wanted to donate his organs to medicine. Now, let me stress that it’s
    not hard to lose your appetite when people around you start talking
    about getting ran over by a truck, having their liver surgically
    extracted and transplanted to a dying boy waiting for a donor. Really
    interesting. So uncle Ben, don’t leave anything out; why not tell us
    about the holiday ham you bought and the friend you ran into and the
    details of what you talked about? Asshole.

  • Most of my
    relatives from this side of the family drinks. But for some strange
    reason, they do not drink over Christmas or New Year, which, in my
    opinion, are the two most important times to get drunk. I haven’t
    figured out whether all of this is done intentionally just to piss me
    off, but I have to tell you, having a couple of bottles of Red Horse
    would make it a lot easier to tolerate and be forgiving about tactless
    comments and ridiculously inappropriate and pointless topics of
    conversation.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my family;
most especially my mom, my dad, my fairy godmother, my
retarded brother and all my evil stepbrothers and stepsisters; It’s
just my extended family that drives me fucking nutters.

Posted by mikey at 11:51 PM | permalink

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