This is why NOBODY should attempt to chat with me. EVER.

Wednesday, January 4, 2006

(16:49:21) Some Girl: hello..
(16:49:35) Some Girl: im one of the people who enjoys reading ur blogs..:D
(16:50:19) Mike: ;) which one?
(16:51:52) Some Girl: the atrocities of frenster..:)
(16:51:59) Mike: Oh I see.
(16:52:04) Mike: What's your name?
(16:54:01) Some Girl: r u a professional writer?
(16:55:49) Mike: You don't know ME? Mike Villar? Shut up!
(16:56:00) Mike: I wrote four international bestsellers
(16:57:54) Some Girl: really! wat r the internetional bestsellers that u wrote? :)
(16:59:17) Some Girl: now i know ur really mike villar..
(16:59:19) Some Girl: :D
(16:59:23) Mike: Two of which were banned by the catholic church; but who gives a flying fuck right? The catholic church is run by a bunch of conservative pussies.
(16:59:16) Some Girl: yeah, ur right!!
(16:59:39) Some Girl: wats d title of the two books?
(17:00:37) Mike: The first one was "Wacky Vatican Anal sex adventure fun"
(17:01:05) Some Girl: and the other one?
(17:01:07) Mike: the second one was "sucking sweaty balls"

(17:01:22) Some Girl: lolz…:))
(17:01:40) Some Girl: and wat r ur inspirations in writing these books??
(17:01:55) Mike: Well you do know I have cancer right?
(17:02:57) Some Girl: is that really true?
(17:04:42) Mike: Yes. So basically that's my inspiration. I'm basically lashing out indiscriminately at the world.
(17:05:15) Some Girl: oh i see..
(17:06:02) Mike: Yes I have a rare type of cancer that affects my eyes and triggers my schizophrenia. So bear with me; chatting with me can be a rather harrowing experience because of all my afflictions.
(17:06:54) Some Girl: yes..ryt now i dnt really now wats real and not..im kinda mixed up ryt now…
(17:07:30) Mike: YEAH THAT'S RIGHT FUCKING BITCH
(17:09:03) Mike: I WANNA SLIT YOUR JUGULARS AND DRINK THE SWEET RED WINE THAT FLOWS WITHIN YOU
(17:09:16) Mike: i'm really sorry, my cancer's acting up.
(17:09:09) Some Girl: u know, u remind me of that monster in lotr who always says my precious..lolz..
(17:09:41) Mike: I don't watch lord of the rings. LOTR is gay.
(17:09:59) Mike: Anyway, how old are you?
(17:10:03) Some Girl: but u r gay, ryt?
(17:10:13) Some Girl: its in ur profile..
(17:10:39) Some Girl: im 21..
(17:11:26) Mike: I'm not Gay.
(17:12:37) Some Girl: then y r u telling the whole world ur gay??
(17:13:04) Some Girl: is that an effect of ur cancer?
(17:13:07) Mike: Well at least Mike isn't. I told you I have schizophrenia right? And I have multiple personality disorder
(17:13:46) Mike: So my other personality; Michael Joe, is a coke-snorting astronaut from the future.
(17:13:49) Some Girl: ok..
(17:13:53) Mike: Michael Joe is GAY.
(17:14:04) Some Girl: and who am i chatting to ryt now?
(17:14:19) Some Girl: oh ok..
(17:14:22) Some Girl: so its michael joe..
(17:14:26) Mike: It's me Mike :)
(17:14:29) Some Girl: alryt..
(17:14:40) Mike: NO YOU FUCKING DIRTY CUNT YOU I'M MICHAEL JOE! I WANNA BUTT FUCK BRAD PITT
(17:14:51) Mike: shut up!!!!! Leave me alone, I'm trying to chat!!!!!
(17:14:59) Mike: sorry about that! :)
(17:15:23) Some Girl: it ok…
(17:15:31) Mike: So enough about me. Tell me about yourself; what do you do for a living?
(17:17:00) Some Girl: well, i work as a programmer..
(17:17:01) Some Girl: how bout u?
(17:17:56) Mike: Well aside from being a bestselling writer, I am an actor as well.
(17:19:42) Mike: But I only play small parts. Did you watch Harry Potter?
(17:19:07) Mike: I was one of the Hufflepuff students. I was the chubby asian kid.
(17:19:10) Some Girl: yup, ive watched it..
(17:19:33) Some Girl: the love interest of harry??
(17:19:37) Some Girl: :)
(17:19:56) Some Girl: lolz..
(17:20:07) Mike: No, that was Cho Chang. Like I said, I was an extra. That Cho chang girl sucked my dick in the trailer though. And man; her mouth was like a vacuum I tells ya.
(17:20:53) Some Girl: but i havnet noticed any chubby asian kid in there except for cho chang..
(17:20:56) Mike: YOU MAGGOT INFESTED SACK OF SHIT! YOU DIRTY CUNT! I'LL CHOKE YOU WITH MY BELT AND RUN YOU OVER WITH MY TAXI!
(17:21:09) Mike: ArghhhhhhhhhHHH!!!!!! shut up!!!!!!
(17:21:15) Mike: sorry :(
(17:21:21) Some Girl: oh so michael joe's here again..
(17:21:50) Mike: yeah sorry about that. I forgot to take my medication.
(17:27:16) Mike:
Hey I need a favor from you

(17:29:21) Some Girl: what?

(17:29:25) Mike: Can we meet up then can you give me oral sex? I mean I'm dying and all

(17:29:29) Some Girl: I dnt want to. Im going nw Im offended bye

(17:30:29) Mike: YOU FUCKING BITCH I'LL KILL YOU! IM GONNA RUN YOU OVER WITH A TAXI AND IM GONNA EAT YOUR HEART AND YOUR UNBORN CHILDREN! DIEE!!!!!

Posted by mikey at 5:32 PM | permalink

Previous Comments

ummm, LOLing is gay. I guess

Posted by Traysikadboy at January 4, 2006, 7:13 pm

You don't REALLY have conversations like this, do you? I mean, people can't be THAT dense.

Oh, wait, they could…

Posted by Shelly at January 5, 2006, 9:13 pm

God. Nothing makes me feel more emotions than reading your blog. It's quite exhausting, really.

Posted by Shelly-s friend Paola at January 5, 2006, 11:34 pm

Glad to see the refer-a-friend program is working.

So you're saying it's better than sex? or like worse?

Posted by Anonymous at January 6, 2006, 12:04 am

Oh, no. I still think sex is better. Although the range of emotions I feel when reading your blog is bigger than when I'm having sex. I've never felt aghast (my new favorite word) while having sex…have you?

Posted by Shelly-s friend Paola at January 6, 2006, 1:33 am

Oh wait. On second thought, I think I HAVE…

Posted by Shelly-s friend Paola at January 6, 2006, 1:34 am

What's sex?

Posted by Anonymous at January 6, 2006, 10:59 am

Dude, Mikey, Mike Joe, whoever,

Schizophrenia and Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) or Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) are two completely different mental disorders. However, based on what I have observed of your coprolalia, which appears to be approaching near-critical levels, the most accurate diagnosis for your condition is Tourette's Syndrome.

Dr kinkylube,
Director of Psychiatry,
Republic of Callipygia

Posted by kinkylube at January 6, 2006, 12:51 pm

Yeah Fuck you man.

Posted by Anonymous at January 6, 2006, 2:43 pm

nice again…hehehe…it's (i think) harsh to talk to someone like that…

Posted by Keiko at January 9, 2006, 9:04 pm

wow breath taking… wonder if we cud chat some time… hehehe

Posted by alvin at January 14, 2006, 11:30 pm

I hate you!!! but i love your blogs…

Posted by mec at January 18, 2006, 7:15 pm

mec: :(

Posted by Anonymous at January 18, 2006, 7:22 pm

funny

Posted by jihan at February 1, 2006, 3:40 am

you really shouldve met up with her.

Posted by alain at February 2, 2006, 5:20 pm

hahaha, i like you you sonafaveeech.Ü

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The star

Mike "Fucking" VillarAwesome

"a Manila-based blogger made famous by his Atrocities of Friendster series, a regular feature he publishes on his blog where he mercilessly criticizes and mocks pictures of ugly people he stumbles upon on popular social networking site, Friendster. Although a lot of people are offended by what he writes, long-time readers of his blog regard him as a brilliant satire writer."

-Taken from my WikiBios page

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